You are what you constantly do..

Hey!
I know its summer and somehow I already know that some changes have to be made to my eating habits since its freaking hot! Also, I think its useful to reset yourself according to different seasons on your path. This means, re-visualizing your goals and drawing up the tools to achieve them progressively and efficiently!
I came across when reading Steve Pavlina's book , a list of different ways to make changes you desire  and I took note of some few points that I think matter so here goes:

Daily goals: setting targets each day in advance.Make a decision on what you will do , then do it. Otherwise, it is easy to become victim of distractions

Procrastination: Focus on the most unpleasant task at hand instead of delaying it.

Productivity:Identify the time when you are the most productive and start with the important tasks for those times. The minor tasks can be done at a later time

Set a target: before beginning a task, identify the target you must reach before you can stop working on it. no matter what.

Early bird: get up early in the morning and work on the most important task.

Neatness: A clutter free home and office make for better working environment

Pareto rule: the 80-20 Rule that states: 80 per cent of the value of a task comes from 20 per cent of effort. Focus your energy on that 20 per cent.

Punctuality: Always arrive early for appointments. Punctuality enhances authority

Prioritize: Separate truly important tasks from the merely urgent. Allocate time to work on really important tasks.

At the end of a work day: Identify the first task you will work on the next day and set out materials in advance.

Intuition: Go with your instinct.Its probably right most of the time

Training: Train up you skills in various productivity habits. For example: Increase your typing speed to 60 word per minute.

There are many different ways to change habits.Choose the ones that apply to your lifestyle.


Peace and luv xx

Ness

5Goals1Week: On Being Persistent

So, when we focus on what we want: Whatever we feel or want to achieve in life, I learned that being persistent is one of the tools that can help get you where you need to go. It could be, you want to buy a car or even go on a trip, start a business, have better grades at school.. it could be anything really
 I then wanted to share these few notes from Steve Pavlina's Self Development for smart people. This may serve as an encouragement or guide to some of us who may not understand the many metrics of acquiring what it is they deserve.

As an individual, we need to give ourselves the TIME to build our effectiveness. The role of persistence is to  develop ourselves from novices to experts, knowing that the expert level is where most rewards are found.
Success is never easy. It is actually very difficult to succeed at something New, never done before.That is why,  failure is an important part of success.When you fail, it means you are taking action because  you made mistakes  and are educating yourself- just remember to be patient with yourself, not to pressure yourself,tune in to your past self and be grateful for what happened.
Success come naturally once you finally learn how to take the CORRECT Actions.

As Calvin Coolidge quotes:

'Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence.Talent will not;nothing is more common than successful men with talent. genius will not;unrewarded genius is almost a proverb.Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination are omnipotent. The slogan " Press on" has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race'


Love & Peace,

Ness

What would you do without a GIRL- FRIEND??

So lets talk Friendship Business Okay ?! because I can sense as I grow further into Adulthood how friendships can change; but also their importance in our lives in general. Nevertheless, living in a much more digitized world could make it hard or even confusing to understand friendships as a whole

According to Encyclopedia.com (2012), Friendship is a relationship  made up of broad, ambiguous or shifting borders.Moreover, the term friend and friendship means different things to different people at a different time. This suggests that, friendship could be looked at just like would intimate relationships. Also, some people are blessed with great friendships starting from elementary,primary, secondary leading to higher education. This is a Gift for some people because not everyone can enjoy that luxury of long-term friends.

Nowadays,most women are known to be notorious to other women  they may encounter in society, politics,in the workplace, at home etc. In fact, an article in thedailyfemme(2012) states that women could be described as misogynists themselves with the example of the Salem witch trials. Furthermore, these trials occurred between 1692 to 1693 in Massachussets , USA  where three women were brought to court as they were being accused of practicing some sort of witchcraft at the time. Of the two women that pleaded innocent, the third woman claimed that she was guilty of being influenced by "bad spirits" and suggested that other women practiced as well as she did. Unfortunately, this confession led to all three women  being thrown in jail. (smithsonianmag, 2007)Subsequently, it caused a lot of controversy with people believing that any other women could be influenced as well.

This goes to show that,  women sometimes do try to put other women down. The question remains why do they behave in this manner? could it be to exercise power over other women? It could be  for many reasons.

Subsequently, the term friendship is referred as a relationship where both partners  express individualized interest, concern, commitment. Also, friends commit by giving themselves the time in absence of constraints toward interaction that are external to the relationship itself. Finally, the more these factors are expressed the stronger the friendship. ( Encyclopedia.com, 2012)

When it comes to women vs men in terms of friendships , it is clear that there are some gender differences:

 The table above shows that friendships between Women are not praised in society, they have a bad reputation. On the other hand, Men are praised for their ability to be unselfish and their willingness to sacrifice themselves in the name of friendship.

My experience with friendship: it has been overwhelming throughout my life stages. However, I understood that they played a role into making me the person I am today . I grew up as the only girl with three brothers and never really experienced the "dark side" of friendships until I made friends with other women. The more I looked into it the more I realized that it also had something to do with me and that i had to look at myself first before looking at them. Still I'm glad i do not have a sister  ( no offense to those who do) simply because I have more fun with my brothers. I have had some okay experiences with women but I do not envy those with sisters. I simply do not.                 

I recently came across a teaching  by Iyanla Vanzant from the Oprah's lifeclass, on relationships with women, especially those involving a lot of cattiness, competition etc. whatever you may call it. This makes me think there hope for us women :), particularly those who believe it is acceptable to behave in a rather Repulsive manner or worse! These few tips from Iyanla Vanzant make it clear for us who may be confused about where the misbehavior of certain women may stem from:

http://www.oprah.com/oprahs-lifeclass/Oprah-and-Iyanla-Vanzant-Terrible-Things-Women-Do-to-Each-Other

5 Reasons women lie to each other:

• Fear of losing Love & Respect
• Fear of Hurting, Upsetting a& Disappointing
• To Cover Issues of self worth
• When we feel threatened
• To be polite

" Gossip is when you have a malice of intent or mindless, third-party conversation to someone about someone, something you haven't said to that someone".

When women Gossip  ( and I am guilty of this one ha!) Its self hexing. Because when you do it, it comes back to you.

On why women Gossip :

• To get power
• Its an acceptable practice
• We don't recognize the power of the spoken word
• It diverts attention to our own issues

  "This is the truth about self-hatred. Truly successful, powerful people want other people to be empowered. Truly successful people want you to be empowered because they want you to feel the light they are feeling."

Why women Betray each other:

1) Self Hatred
2) We do not honor our relationships
3)We seek external validation
4)We do not Honor ourselves
5)We mimic what we have seen
6) We hold unrealistic demands

These are just some notes from my watching that episode and you too can watch ( see website link above) and maybe you can learn & grow from it as well.

To conclude, you may want to ask yourself this question as a woman: How can I shift my behavior in order to create CONSTRUCTIVE, POSITIVE, VALUABLE RELATIONSHIPS with other women?

 Love,

Ness

5 goal1week-Professional Goal:Young,Hustling and Fabulous

Day 5: Professional goal

Career goals are important because they act as a destination for your career. For instance, if you were to drive to a specific location; you would get nowhere without a map or an address wouldn't you? Without those tools you would just drive off in circles and come back to point A :(

Career Goal addresses the location you are heading to. Without a Career goal you would probably feel like you are bored and disengaged in life or even better, "Something would be Missing "

Benefits of setting Career Goals:

• Knowing where your efforts should be focused upon
• Easily notice the distractions that may deter you from achieving a specific goal 

• Motivated to do more and more, building self confidence as you get comfortable setting and achieving your goals  

There are Two Types of  General Goals that  can be set: Long term and Short term goals. I shall write up a later article about long term goals and short term goals. First,  lets take a look at a few bits of an awesome article by Marc and Angel : 12 Things Successful People do differently.

According to this principle,successful people are objective.  They have realistic targets in mind.  They know what they are looking for and why they are fighting for. In other words SMART Goals Are Defined as: Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Timely.

For more details: visit www.Marcandangel.com 

Love and Light xx